Yeah, it's about 3 in the morning and I am up...and too worked up to go to bed till I get this out to whoever will read.
Reasons why I am crying right now:
~It seems like the people closest to me never actually listen to me. I know, I talk to too much and too loud sometimes, but i have been battling for a word in edgewise my whole life. Would it hurt to just listen? Trust me, I have tried it, it's not bad at all. I don't want to be told what to do about my problems, I just want to be heard and understood.
~I haven't gone dancing, sang or done much drawing in months. It's hard not to have time or resources to express yourself.
~I wish I could just get to work on time, for once.
~I feel like my potential isn't ever going to start being fulfilled and I feel like it's my fault because I am too lazy and tired.
~I am just a dreamer.
~I want to be organized but somehow I forget to start.
~I am so afraid of my future. Growing up just sucks.
~I am stressing over everything.
I have no more to say.
I hear you! Your at that point in your life were you are just getting more and more responesablity. I've been there and it does suck. I hope things start getting easier for you.
ReplyDeleteIt seems like some people, in my experience mostly guys but it could be anyone who is more assertive and action-oriented, think that you're talking about problems because you're asking for help or solutions, not just to talk it off. So they always try to offer help, or get really frustrated if they don't see how they could help you or if you reject their solutions. People who like to talk about it just to get it off their chest don't get why the other person keeps trying to get involved and the other person doesn't see why you just want to sit around complaining. Once you realize this it helps a little... especially if you preface the conversation with, "I just want to talk about something, i don't really want any suggestions or anything."
ReplyDeleteAlso, I always feel like I'm losing my chances to reach my potential like I should, too. But, ya know, there have to be slow parts in life or you die too soon. We will probably both have plenty of years in our lifetimes to do all the things we want to if they are really important and we make plans for it.
it's a silent cry for help, but it's only silent because nobody is listening...
ReplyDelete