Today, I wrote to a friend, trying to give some encouragement on his situation. I feel like what I wrote came from the heart and is something anyone could apply to themselves to make their lives better and more joyful. Here is what I wrote:
"If there is one thing I have learned in life, being flexible
and having plenty of trust in God is going to bring you a lot more
happiness. Here are some examples:
1. I
wanted to travel more and wait to get married. But then I got married.
And a year later, he changed his major to international studies! Now we
are saving up to go to Europe for part of his schooling!
2.
I said I would never work retail again, because I thought it was such a
draining boring, drama-filled job to have. Well, then I became
desperate for work and eventually got hired at DownEast, and I work at
the mall. But, I have THE BEST coworkers that make me laugh my face off
and I just got promoted! Plus lots of cute clothes for cheaps!
3.
I was thinking of dropping out of college to go to makeup school, but
for some reason, I decided I needed to stay and finish my Bachelor's
degree. Well, because of that I ended up getting a volunteer internship
serving children and parents in need. It was one of the best experiences
I have ever had, and I learned things that I use every day to make my
life better! Plus, that experience helped land my other current job,
working at a really amazing preschool, teaching sweet little children
that I love love love.
In
all of these situations, I ended up not getting what I "wanted", but in
the end I got blessings that gave me so much more joy than I could have
anticipated. If you have a strong desire and it is something that is
righteous and enriching to your life, God will help you obtain
happiness, though it may be in a different way than you expected. But in
order for that to work, you have to have faith and trust Him. The
better of an attitude you have, the sooner that happiness will come."
This advice was met with pretty negative feedback. I wasn't giving him this advice to tell him exactly what to do in this particular situation or how to live his life, I just wanted to show that sometimes things don't happen how we plan and not to be sad and upset about it. I said things that I know have helped me be more happy and I thought could be comforting to him.
I suppose he isn't yet at a state of mind where he could read other's thoughts and learn something useful from them without completely agreeing with every word.
I would like to make one correction to what I wrote, which is that if you have a certain desire or dream that is righteous I personally think that with lots of faith and prayer and doing your best to obtain it, God will give you many blessings along the way to help you reach that dream. However, I can't guarantee that, because sometimes things just aren't meant to be (and it's not my place to say what will and won't happen in someone's life), but as stated previously, something better will come if you keep doing your best.
Anyway, I have terminated contact with this person. Don't think I am a loose cannon for doing this, please don't. He has done some pretty hurtful things in the past and I feel like I have done my part to politely express my feelings plenty of times (and forgive him), but each time he clearly shows that he doesn't have much empathy or understanding when other people get hurt. I kinda saw this coming and knew that it was time to be done with the unhealthy negativity and drama he was bringing into my life.
So if you're here to learn something learn this:
1. Follow your dreams, but have a nice flexible, positive attitude about it.
2. You deserve more than negative friends who can't appreciate your kind gestures and forgiveness.
Trying faithfully to do my best,
Brynn
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